I have wanted to text him no less than 1000 times already. I have looked at my phone several times to see if he changed his mind… to see if he wanted to tell me he made a mistake leaving me. As you can guess it has not happened.
I feel like the walls are closing in on me. I don’t know where to turn.
Part of me does not want to bother him with a text...that would be pathetic.
The other part of me is screaming and crying to stand up and fight for him, don’t let him go.
…and I don’t know which part is right.
I was supposed to go see him in a few weeks and I would do anything to just be in his arms again where I feel so safe and happy.
I should have loved him more, yet I don’t know how that is possible. I respect him for being honest with me about his feelings. So I guess I am supposed to let him go since that is what he wants.
I guess it is just hard for me because I feel like I am a good person and deserve to be happy too, but I just don’t see that happening without him.
I really don’t know what to do… I was kidding myself when I thought I could be everything he ever wanted and needs
The only thing I do know for certain is… my heart, just leave it broken; some things are just better that way. Unless he comes and picks up the pieces I will not need it.
I am so sorry that you are hurting. I wish I could make it better. *Hugs*
ReplyDeleteJoker: Thank you, but I don't think anything is ever going to make it better.
ReplyDeleteLet it be. Feel your pain, learn from it and live in the now not the what if. No one can change a past and no one can totally shape a future but you can live right now as you are, heal as you are able and see what this day brings to you.
ReplyDeleteThe Walking man - I will do the best I can, it is easier to read than to do.
ReplyDeleteif it just happened yesterday you are still really raw. Broken hearts suck, and it's hard to heal. How long was the relationship? I'm thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteCityMom: 2 years. He is really a great guy.
ReplyDelete